One thing that I’ve noticed…I get about 200 spam messages in a couple of weeks…this is so annoying because of the time it takes to delete them. I don’t understand spammers and what is the ‘reward’ they get from doing it.

On my birthday next week, Bobby will be gone 5 months…every day since he died has been tearful and sad. I so don’t want to be alone, I want him back, but I think I’m beginning to realize he won’t EVER be home again… :(  

My heart is broken, my life is unraveling, I know that Jesus is with me, but I don’t always ‘feel’ His presence. I just keep breathing and putting one foot in front of the other hoping that I will eventually come out of this. One thing that I’ve learned; the only way OUT of grief is by going THROUGH it. I never know when I’m going to fall apart and start crying…I’m crying right now as I write these words…I don’t like this pain.